A female high school students in a city focused, high and one into the school after the new class not found a familiar face, which felt very lonely. A ride home in a middle school met with the school's male students, was very cordial, the two quickly fell in love from strangers to, and often secretly dating and have letters and telephone contact. The girls final exam grades plummeted, teachers and parents of girls are very shocked. His mother a chance to see her daughter a letter, found in one of the Not from the girls, her parents determined, in any case have to take control of his daughter. Winter vacation they will not allow his daughter under house arrest in cross-out step. Some parents at home watching, put the door locked when not at home, a way to prevent contact with his daughter and the boys. One day the girl went out to seek freedom in the mother put a poison cup, running for the door. Fortunately, a neighbor of her mother was found and taken to hospital in time, only from death. Later, police officers asked the reasons, the girl said angrily:
from this case, we can see that students love is a sensitive and difficult issues. On the current situation, teachers and parents a high degree of attention to this problem, but treatment is often defective. Parents usually temper no matter how well a child fall in love, they immediately outraged. That part of the teacher, though not rage, but the words between the students will be hurt accidentally. Although the age of children entering puberty earlier than ever, but in the eyes of parents and teachers, but also indeed a child. Kids love, many parents often turn to turn, however, some teachers are not understood. So, many parents and teachers will be the first instinctive reaction, However, students enter adolescence, with the development of physical, sexual consciousness awakening, they are full of joy and curiosity watching the opposite sex, they are yearning for gender, full of beautiful emotions and dreams. At this point, if teachers and parents do not speak method, detention letters, peek diaries, house arrest or even what many people know that downtown ambassadors, will inevitably lead to some tragedy. Because the secondary is in a strong self-esteem, personality vulnerability, lack of self-control, emotional extreme period, adults give them the psychological pressure, likely to cause the child who committed suicide due to Mo Lianxian event or injury to others. Therefore, we must not only attach importance to the problem students puppy love, but also to learn how to solve the problem.
First, early detection and timely guide
is generally believed that the earlier found puppy love, the easier to solve. Therefore, timely and accurately determine whether there is puppy love behavior is a critical step. We can change the behavior of the students observed abnormalities, in general, students often fall in love some of the features are as follows: in the mood to generate a sudden change, the children have been lively, suddenly silent, their parents, relatives and friends do not want to have more contact with other students, school is often more spirit in her eyes straight ahead. Puberty boys and girls love dressing up is normal, but the puppy love of the students often dress has a tendency to pursue adult. More importantly, some changes of its activity rhythm, often alone in the school to the independence, the holiday does not go out, close your bored in the house, write letters, read novels, diary, and often in a daze, do something the total is absent-minded, and out of time, but appears to be particularly busy, do not want to let parents know from the past, the whereabouts and time out, will now advance notice, and will time out, time back. Often before going out to parents especially docile, good certainty, match up, a change in the past, a cold face. If the child has more of these manifestations, especially the last of these characteristics, parents should be aware that the child is likely to be in love.
is worth noting that, we have to prevent the effect, concerned about the child changes, we must also prevent over-sensitive, a mere puppy love love kids dressed to conclude that, in turn paranoid , tracking children, stir up unnecessary conflict. Parents should be informed according to their knowledge about their children, considering the many ways to determine whether the abnormal behavior of children. A teacher's guide should be based mainly on positive, appropriate use of psychological principles to psychological counseling.
Second, understand the growth of teachers and parents to accept the reality
puppy love issues students often make a mistake just do not understand the growth, it is difficult to accept the fact that children love. As adults, with their own ideas to look at this issue often there are differences among students, such as The occurrence called Adults on their own from the start with the position of opposing the students, the students made it very dirty feeling better, apparently easy to make the students in the psychological resistance, followed by the words of parents and teachers also difficult to listen into it. In fact, calmly think about high school students concerned about the opposite sex, attract the opposite sex, it is precisely the course of their normal growth and development, it is natural that, the facts tell us, the children have grown up. Recognizing this, teachers, parents and students can start a conversation like: Many people have encountered is the thing, which is actually just shows that you have a child grow from a young man, you grow up. I very much want to help you if you are willing to listen to my advice ...? about the above passage, I believe that the child will be psychologically prepared to accept the recommendations of adults, it is teachers, parents successful start.
three, giving up to stop the implementation of guidance
students fall in love, though mostly simple and beautiful emotions. However, because they are still in the semi-naive and semi-mature period, and others of their own can not fully understand, emotional impulsiveness, therefore, often adverse puppy love consequences, which is the most direct impact of learning, for this consideration, puppy love can not be allowed to develop, need to implement effective guidance.
found that students love, teachers, parents, students often say is rough block, the students are suppressed, it is prone to conflict, and only enable students to understand the nature of the problem is the fundamental way to solve the problem. Therefore, we must give to stop the implementation of effective guidance. Just think, for the emotional high temperature state school students, let look down to zero, be ordered to never meet, not allowed to ignore each other, is clearly unrealistic. teachers, parents and students themselves have to seize the anxiety, unable to extricate themselves, and would like to know this love will bring What are the results of the psychological, with their own personal experience, or someone else's story, through objective description, let the children realize from the consequences of puppy love. For example when it learned that one the same as their love of high school students, and even Students, after a change in their growth, the student does not necessarily select for the love of lovers, their pros and cons from people see their future, making it possible to cool down the overheated mind. When students rational understanding of the problem, the teachers, parents seeking solutions, we can make recommendations to him, removed his report, the two become enemies is not necessary, you can open normal contacts, but not beyond the boundaries of friends, rather than the time spent in puppy love, the better to seize the present learning opportunities for their future increase in the strength of a competition, so that future self in each other's minds even more perfect. similar to each other, to treasure in the heart of this emotion, until the two sides The emotional commitment to capacity, go enjoy it. This can be sublimated into a passion for great mental power, to go into the study.
four, eliminating the mysterious normal Communication
experiments have indicated that children grow up normal heterosexual partners in all stages of the lack of exchanges of experience, it is precisely the reason causing adolescent love at first sight, the opposite sex are among the more mysterious, the more curious. Therefore, restrictions with the opposite sex, not a good way to solve the problem puppy love, the real solution should be through education so that young people understand the changes taking place in their bodies, to eliminate the mystery, and advocate normal relations between men and women, and, to make young people understand that as a rational person will have, how to control their emotions, resulting in the establishment on the basis of the conscious inhibition. the only way to enable young people to better adapt to complex cultural environment and living environment, under the control of reason, will all the energy into the normal life to the study, and gradually grow into a modern physical and mental health of youth.
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